2am

It's 2 am right now, going to sleep.

But something does bother me. >_< 

The result (penerapan uitm) will be on the next monday 8/8/16

I think i'm totally doomed!!!

The closer the date, the more stressful i am.

I'm somehow quite excited to know which field i'll be studied in, for my degree.

But . . . . .

I'm quite afraid of something.

Ok, my first choice is mbbs240 sarjana muda perubatan dan sarjana muda pembedahan

2nd: sarjana muda fisioterapi (hons)

3rd: sarjana muda sains (hons) kimia forensik

I do love biology, i do fall in <3 in chemistry, i'm happy to study physics.

Hmmm why did i put fisio as my second choice????? It should be forensic chem.

Some of my friends did said "sure you'll get mbbs"

Ohhhh come on. >...<

It makes me more scared, almost loss my mind

The overthinking dramas start with,

If i get the 1st choice (mbbs), i'm questioning myself:

"Can i go through that??"

"Do i really deserve it??"

"Then, physician will be my career, can i cope with 'their' lifestyle, more to the schedule, the super hectic life?? I want to have fun with my family too, i want to spend my time with my parents, eventhough i'm working"

"How i'll study the MEGA amount of medical stuffs??? Can i?? Will i able??"

>>…<<

The lists continue . . . . .

Next, if i get the 2nd choice which is fisio . . .

Oh myyyyy, i'm questioning myself, why did.  i put that course as my 2nd choice :'( 

I really cann't imagine how i'll work in that career.

In simple word, i just don't want. . . .

Next, 3rd choice (forensic chem)

It should be my 2nd choice.

My lecturer said that this course is major in chemistry and the forensic is just a minor part.

Sometimes, i do hope, if i didn't get the 1st choice, please give me this choice.

But, logically, how can the admin skip the 2nd choice and give me the 3rd choice.

But Allah have power to do that.

I hope time will be so smooth and slow, after the result came out. :-D 

I just need to express it.

I just need to say it out.

I'm not expecting much, just for self satisfaction

Thank you family, friends, people, having faith in me. :'( 

Sorry if i've disappoint you.

What ever will be, may Allah give us strength and patient to go through it, together

I don't know the course that i'll get

>really hope that i'll be studying medicine with aina asyran ;-) <

But i'm pretty sure that Allah know the best for me.

Suddenly, feeling sinful :'(